Out-Of-Court Divorce Negotiation Useful But Not Always Successful

Going through divorce is often one of the more trying experiences that individuals go through. You may have expected your relationship to last a lifetime when you tied the knot, but over the years, the reality of your unhappiness in the marriage came to the forefront. Though you may not hold any animosity toward your spouse, you knew that ending the marriage was the best decision.

You may have broken the news to your spouse and found that he or she took it relatively well. Of course, that does not mean that your divorce case will be free from conflict, but it could set you on the right path for coming to a settlement more easily and more quickly.

Can you negotiate on your own?

Many people do have the ability to come to divorce settlements without having to go through a knock-down, drag-out court case. Still, it is important that you have legal counsel on your side so that you understand your legal rights and how Kansas laws will affect the outcomes of your case. Additionally, if you want to work toward successful negotiations, you may want to keep the following tips in mind:

• Refrain from arguing about why the marriage came to an end. Staying focused on the matters at hand rather than rehashing marital issues could streamline negotiations.
• Have an attitude conducive to compromise. If you go into negotiations thinking about only what you want and are unwilling to change your mind, negotiations may not go well.
• Treat your soon-to-be ex-spouse civilly. Refrain from placing blame or immediately shooting down his or her ideas at compromising.
• Avoid becoming defensive. If the other party tries to make an unreasonable suggestion or attempts to create an argument, try to maintain a calm attitude.
• Allow your spouse to speak his or her mind without interrupting to add your opinion.

Of course, even if you have the highest hopes for an easy negotiation, they do not always go as well as intended. As a result, your case could still end up in court. This outcome does not mean that you have to have an overly difficult case, but it does mean that the court will have more say in the final outcome of your divorce order. Still, you have the ability to fight for the outcomes that you feel best suit your interests.