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Myths that hurt marriages

Problems within a marriage sometimes arise not out of fundamental differences between two people but because of faulty ways of thinking. Kansas residents might like to know about some widely believed marriage myths that can actually hurt relationships. These toxic views can warp one's perception about marriage and cause issues in even healthy unions.

A couple may think that their marriage ended because of irreconcilable personality traits that proved insurmountable. However, it's a myth that personality flaws ruin marriages. Everyone has flaws that are difficult or practically impossible to get rid of. Incompatible personalities and an inability to deal with another's flaws are likely not the issue. The important part is how one reacts to their spouse's vulnerabilities and flaws. Instead of laughing off or not taking vulnerabilities seriously, a spouse should respect and listen when told about a partner's weak spots.

Active listening is a conflict resolution technique that works in many scenarios. However, it's a myth that active listening saves marriages. This is because listening to and validating criticism from a spouse can be more difficult than fielding complaints from a coworker, friend or anyone else. Active listening tactics are meant to reduce conflict, but conflict in a marriage is sometimes unavoidable. Using tools to moderate arguments might be useful and necessary, but a couple should keep in mind that strong marriages can handle occasional shouting matches and heated arguments.

Going through a divorce can be difficult because it requires skills that one or both partners may have had trouble with during a marriage. Divorce often requires honesty, communication and compromise, and both parties must try to work together to reach a mutually beneficial settlement agreement.

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